Can you ever fix a first impression?
A true first impression has a lot of pressure. Am I presenting myself the right way? Will this benefit me? Am I speaking in the proper tone? Queue tons of personal thoughts assessing yourself…
No matter how much of the “authentic self” we try to say matters, fitting into the mold of a first impression is important. To us and to whomever we are trying to impress (personal and professional).
First day of school today. My youngest is making his first impression. He starts Kindergarten today. His first time in the school district, so there are very limited strings attached to him. (Stay tuned for personal brands that come with yourself regardless tomorrow…)
See, Lucas, has never been in this building. He has to build a social group, show what type of academic focus he has, display his manners, show he can be coach-able and well behaved. And with that, his first impression will solidify how teachers, peers, parents and key staff mention him when he is not in the room.
My hope is they say things like:
Lucas Gabriel is a lovely child and well-mannered
He plays nicely with others
He participates in class
He is a sweetheart
Some of these statements have actions tied to them, but some are “feelings” that he will need to exude from them in his actions. See his older sisters, they don’t have that type of pressure today. They are not new to their buildings. Sure, they have new teachers, new curriculum, some new classmates… but they also have prior feedback following them.
Teachers have to talk to help place students. Peers tell each other about their friends and their foes. Key staff in the building make passing statements. Hopefully for my daughters they have statements about them similar to the ones I desire for my son. So when they enter the room, the Gabriel Girls are already known as “friendly, polite, fashionable, studious….” and one is likely also known as “sarcastic, funny and chatty.”
It cannot be helped. These conversations have to happen and that is why there is pressure on a first impression. And if you think that this does not matter in the professional world, you must never talk to others. Think of colleagues you talk to (virtual or in-person), you know you have referenced someone in a positive light and definitely in a negative light. Those little nuggets of information eventually build up and into a brand persona.
So, back to the question at hand - if it goes bad, can you adjust it? I believe you should always be actively working on it so that it never can go bad. And to do that, you set manageable goals by asking yourself no more than 3 questions, regularly.
For my 3 kids, we set school year goals last night. Academic, Social and Stretch. And every night at dinner we will discuss them. And it will help them have real continuous feedback (not the “systems” that companies use) but to actually talk to my husband and I about where they are on those manageable 3 questions daily.
Time flies, and as we approach Q4 it is important to know that you won’t change on 1/1/2026 just because. You will not just accomplish things by 12/31/2025 (or whatever last day you are in office in December). You need to work at it. So, I challenge you to make no more than 3 manageable goals and ask yourself the same questions every day. Have an honest conversation with someone you trust (or yourself - heck, I love this stuff, so just text me!).
I think you can truly redesign an impression by working at it. But wouldn’t it be great if you worked at what you want before the impression comes into play.